Thursday, November 12, 2009

If I break a glass and nobody sees it, did it really happen???

It's very possible. So I think there is a reason I don't clean that much. It's probably because I'm lazy, but also cause I mess everything up. So here goes the tale...

It all started on tuesday. I was actually in the mood to clean (shocker to those who know me I know). So I decided to vacuum up the bedroom and the bathroom. Why the bathroom you say? Well, I thought it would be easier then sweeping. so anyway, I'm vacuuming the bedroom and doing an awesome job in the room till the container on the vacuum is full. So I go outside to clean it out in Egypt's poo-can , and decide to look at the filter. IT WAS FILTHY! Now this is a brand new vacuum that has only been used maybe twice. I really wish that wasn't a lie. So i thump the filter on the floor a bit to get all the grime out. I swear there could have been an ant colony with all the dirt/muck in there. Now I'm pretty disgusted at this point and bummed because i have to go vacuum the room again to make sure i didn't miss anything... I did. I had to go clean out the vacuum again when I was done. So this is where it gets good. I decide that it would be easier to vacuum the bathroom, so I wouldn't have to fiddle around with the broom and dust pan... Good idea, but when it gets put into action its ridiculous. I Get close the one of the rugs and I step on it so it doesn't get sucked up into the vac. Well I wasn't paying attention to the other rug that was one inch away. Literally. So I hear the vacuum gagging on the other rug and i have to shut it off real quick which isn't as easy at it sounds. I am in the middle of panicking and trying to touch the power pedal, but i keep pushing the release so the handle will pivot. But I finally got it and the vacuum was saved. The rug got a little jacked up but nothing a little toss in the washer can't fix.

So now to yesterday! Another story with the vacuum. I decided to vacuum the living room. So I make all the precautions of moving the chairs asking Natalie if she could move the ottoman, and making sure nay loose wires are outta the way. So the whole thing is going without a hitch till I am 99.9% done. I hear a noise that sounds like a piece of paper got sucked up, but no... It was our extra 80 dollar mac charger!!! I shut the vacuum off as soon as I heard Nat say Oh No! So we check the wire and the entire side of it was completely stripped. At the time I was pretty bummed about it, but now its pretty funny. This vacuum has it out for me and/or my possessions. THANK YOU FOR THE VACUUM TASCHE!!!

Now to today. I woke up at about 6:30 this morning. I could have sworn i heard some glass breaking, and also my neighbors stupid dog was outside my window barking. So I was tired of laying in bed, and had nothing to do. So I fed Egypt earlier and had her do all her business for the morning. So then I get on my laptop and start listening to music. And for some reason I decide to clean again...Bad idea. So remember that broken glass??? Well it stayed in my mind the whole time, and thats what makes this story ironic. I remembered the dishes got washed I guess maybe yesterday... Shows how well I remember. So I start to unload them and everything is going well. Then I get to the plates. I hate plates. No matter how quiet you are trying to be... They make it impossible. I touched 2 plates together and you'd swear it sounds like someone just threw a rock through your window. I manage to get all the plates stacked and ready for moving, without waking anyone in the apartment/the dead. And.......... Success!!!! I didn't break the plates. Now its times to load what little dishes are in the sink. A few bowls and silverware, no big deal. Then I find a little vase that I spent about an hour cleaning tuesday. It was very groovy( and I mean it in the details, not the way hippies use it) I thought i would put the vase in the dish washer, but didn't because I heard Natalie wake up and I didn't want her to come out and see what I had done yet. So I go and tell her good morning and that I was cleaning. So after that I go back to the kitchen and... You guessed it. I knocked the vase of the counter and it shatters all over the floor. I couldn't believe it!!! All that work to clean it and get the ancient dust off, just to have it smash all over the floor. So I'm pretty ticked because there went my morning of silent cleaning. And for a blind person thats not exactly the easiest thing to do. Good thing Natalie was awake... She came and swept for me. I didn't want to move because i was bare foot and knowing my lousy luck my first step would have been on the biggest most jagged piece of glass... After that I wasn't much in the mood to finish.

So if this is some kind of hint that I shouldn't clean, I wish I would have taken it. O well I was trying to help Nat out a bit. She's been busy with school and Guide dogs of Texas stuff. And for me cleaning from now on... I RETIRE!!!!! haha Thats a line from scarface. thanks for checking in again everyone, there is more to come.

2 comments:

Ro said...

Oh man oh man oh man do I relate to just about everything on here!! You have inspired me to write a blog about my blind vacuuming experience. Oh man, this was too great!

Nat's mom - Tasch said...

So very glad you absolutely love the totally terrific new vacuum :) Just let me know if there are any other gifts I can bestow upon you to make your life more interesting! Trust me though, I think it just ingrained into vacuums to literally suck the life out of everything they accidentally touch. I have lost many treasured items to mine, not to mention how many barbie doll heads and micro machine cars the kids lost over the years! I double dog dare you to use the attachments next time! Ha-Ha..